


On The Road Pt III

by covetsubjugation



Series: The Infamous Story of 'The Squad' [40]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F, F/M, Multi, Texting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-09
Updated: 2016-09-09
Packaged: 2018-08-14 01:37:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,283
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7993837
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/covetsubjugation/pseuds/covetsubjugation
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"<b>disney god</b><br/>we’re trying not to die in a foreign land</p><p><b>fight me</b><br/>we’re still in america</p><p><b>disney god</b><br/>look buddy unless i came out of my mother’s vagina here we’re in foreign land"</p><p>*<br/>They are back on the road again! Well, it's not called a road trip for nothing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	On The Road Pt III

**the squad**   **  
**_aaron burr, angel, ayyyymaria, baguette fucker, better than you, disney god, dosiaaa, eliza, fight me, get ur own dicc, jamesmadd, peggy_

 **aaron burr  
** So

 **jamesmadd  
** no  
we are not discussing it  
not now not ever

 **aaron burr  
** Okay, sure  
But I was just going to ask if Thomas is coming with us to Disney World because we’re leaving now

 **jamesmadd  
** oh

 **better than you  
** yes i shall come along

 **fight me  
** do you want to ride with thomas in his own car or

 **jamesmadd  
** No

 **fight me  
** okay just trying to be considerate

 **angel  
** relationship drama aside  
we gotta go  
because this is an 11 hour drive

 **eliza  
** we’re stopping at charlotte??

 **angel  
** yes but that is still 6 hours away let’s gO

 **better than you  
** okay let me pack

 **angel  
** for the love of god

 **peggy  
** this is going to become that thing where no one is ready and we never leave isn’t it

 **ayyyymaria  
** don’t curse us

*

 **James Madison  
** _online_

so

no alex

okay

*

 **the squad**   **  
**_aaron burr, angel, ayyyymaria, baguette fucker, better than you, disney god, dosiaaa, eliza, fight me, get ur own dicc, jamesmadd, peggy_

 **better than you  
** i think i’m packed

 **angel  
** idc let’s just go

 **get ur own dicc  
** do we bet if he forgot something

 **better than you  
** no we don’t  
i did not forget anything

 **get ur own dicc  
** i say he forgot something and i’m betting $10 on it

 **disney god  
** i say he forgot something too

 **eliza  
** i say he didn’t

 **better than you  
** thank you eliza

 **angel  
** i say we need to gO

 **get ur own dicc  
** cmon kids before mum starts yelling

*

 **eliza  
** i call shotgun

 **peggy  
** shit

 **eliza  
** don’t worry i’ll let you play music

 **peggy  
** that’s suspiciously generous  
what’s the catch

 **eliza  
** no catch

 **peggy  
** you’re gonna change my background to your face or something aren’t you

 **eliza  
** no i promise i’m not

 **angel  
** can you two hElp put the luggage in the car??

 **peggy  
** Yikes™

 **baguette fucker  
** somehow angelica, despite being fervently single, is somehow the soccer mum of this group

 **angel  
** we are driving a hideously ugly car to save on gas on a cross country trip  
and i have been yelling at you for a long time

 **dosiaaa  
** you haven’t threatened to turn the car around yet

 **angel  
** trust me every day i grow closer to that point

 **better than you  
** who’s driving

 **fight me  
** you

 **better than you  
** why me i let you stay in my house

 **fight me  
** shit he’s right

 **better than you  
** did you just admit i’m right

 **fight me  
** mOVING ON

 **get ur own dicc  
** i can drive

 **baguette fucker  
** can you??

 **disney god  
** on a scale of alex to aaron how safe of a driver are you

 **fight me  
** oi

 **disney god  
** ily but full offence  
you lost your license  
this is warranted

 **get ur own dicc  
** maria?

 **baguette fucker  
** that’s reasonable

 **fight me  
** @ **eliza** can i get shotgun

 **eliza  
** alex  
i already called it

 **fight me  
** which is why i’m asking you personally  
and i just want to be next to my boyfriend

 **eliza  
** urghhh  
fine

 **peggy  
** seriously i’m your sister and you let alex ride shotgun?

 **eliza  
** he asked

 **peggy  
** so have i

 **eliza  
** nicely

 **peggy  
** …  
you got me there

 **aaron burr  
** You’re still not helping?

 **peggy  
** righT

 **fight me  
** don’t worry peggy i am a benevolent music chooser

 **better than you  
** we are never going to leave are we

 **jamesmadd  
** if that’s the case i’m going to pee

 **baguette fucker  
** The One Where No One’s Ready

 **disney god  
**!!!  
you have been watching friends!!

 **baguette fucker  
** you all seemed very adamant i should watch it

 **get ur own dicc  
** we didn’t expect you to be so fast

 **baguette fucker  
** they are like 20 minute long each?

 **dosiaaa  
** is it me or are 20 minute episodes easier to watch than 40 minute eps?  
i’ll settle down for 1 episode and i look up and 5 hours have passed and i’ve finished a season

 **baguette fucker  
** exactly??

 **ayyyymaria  
** same!!  
i’ll struggle through like a season of 40 minute episodes  
like i’ll never have time for it  
but i always have time for 20 minute episodes

 **dosiaaa  
** laf what’s your favourite episode so far

 **baguette fucker  
** the one where no one’s ready  
but like friends is really straight

 **jamesmadd  
** yes!! it’s so straight  
friends is iconic and all but honestly all the jokes are so straight  
let chandler be bisexual

 **baguette fucker  
** phoebe is pansexual let’s be honest

 **angel  
** this is a great discussion but it can also happen in the car which needs to be on its way right about noW

 **get ur own dicc  
** we gotta go!!

*

 **fight me  
** peggy if you want to pass your phone forward we can play your music first

 **peggy  
**!!  
bless

 **better than you  
** seriously?  
what’s new pussycat?

 **peggy  
** okay first of all just cause your user says ‘better than you’ that doesn’t make it true  
second of all i don’t remember having this song on my phone

 **eliza  
** maybe it’s the apple album thing  
like how they always give you a free u2 album

 **peggy  
** apple has really weird music taste  
who even likes u2

 **dosiaaa  
** just on the topic of music  
bastille released wild world today so we’re gonna play that when it’s my turn

 **fight me  
** we probably should have some sort of order of whose music we’re going to listen to

 **baguette fucker  
**!!clipping also released splendour  & misery today!!

 **fight me  
** nICE

 **dosiaaa  
** since i said something first can i go first

 **fight me  
** yeah sure splendour & misery is only half an hour long anyway so we should listen to bastille first

 **dosiaaa  
** do you listen to bastille alex

 **fight me  
** i’m more of a rap kinda guy

 **dosiaaa  
** expand your horizons

 **fight me  
** we’ll give it a shot

*

 **aaron burr  
** Is it me or have we been listening to What’s New Pussycat for a long time

 **peggy  
** is it that long of a song?

 **jamesmadd  
** not really?

 **aaron burr  
** It’s probably just the drive  
Time always seems weird in a car

 **angel  
** it’s fine it just switched over to It’s Not Unusual  
what even is your music taste pegs

 **peggy  
** dON'T CALL ME PEGS  
AND I DEFINITELY DIDN’T DOWNLOAD THE SONG  
ALEX SKIP AHEAD  
WHAT THE FUCK WHY IS IT WHAT’S NEW PUSSYCAT AGAIN  
GIVE ME MY PHONE  
WHAT THE FUCK SOMEONE REPLACED ALL THE SONGS IN MY PHONE TO WHAT’S NEW PUSSYCAT

 **dosiaaa  
** I THOUGHT THE PRANKS ARE OVER

 **peggy  
** WHO DID THIS  
ALL MY MUSIC  
ELIZA IT’S YOU ISN’T IT  
DON’T LIE TO ME I’M YOUR SISTER AND I CAN TELL YOU’RE LAUGHING

 **eliza  
** HAHAHAHAHA  
THIS IS FOR TAKING MY SEAT

 **peggy  
** I’M KILLING YOU

 **ayyyymaria  
** for someone so small peggy has a lot of anger in her body

 **peggy  
** okAy you’re the same size as me  
and short people are closer to hell

 **disney god  
** i feel that this is especially true for people in our group

*

 **angel  
** alex  
why are you taking pictures of laf and herc

 **fight me  
** bECAUSE HERC IS BRAIDING LAF’S HAIR AND LAF IS ASLEEP ON HIS CHEST I AM SO !!!

 **angel  
** okay then  
you do that

 **better than you  
** we’re going to be pulled over by the cops because of the shit you’re pulling

 **jamesmadd  
** lay off i think it’s cute

 **better than you  
** you’ve never braided my hair

 **jamesmadd  
** ,,,

 **peggy  
** weren’t we not discussing this

 **jamesmadd  
** we’re not

 **fight me  
** THEO  
why don’t you put on some bastille  
and we’ll just forget this very pregnant pause

 **dosiaaa  
** GOOD IDEA

*

 **dosiaaa  
** STORIES TOLD TO ME AND STORIES TOLD TO YOU  
AND DID YOU EVER FEEL THAT THEY WERE RINGING TRUE  
AND ALL THEIR WORDS WERE GLORY  
WELL THEY ALL, WELL THEY SOUNDED EMPTY  
WHEN WE’RE LOOKING UP FOR HEAVEN  
LOOKING UP FOR HEAVEN

*

 **fight me  
** i feel slightly confused by that album  
there isn’t a link?

 **dosiaaa  
** no there is!!  
it only becomes apparent on the second listen

 **fight me  
** okay

 **baguette fucker  
** bUt!!  
it’s my turn

 **fight me  
** yeah it is wild world was an hour long  
but theo i wanna know more about bastille

 **dosiaaa  
** yessssss

*

 **baguette fucker  
** splendour & misery is like a space opera

 **angel  
** all of you have really weird music tastes

 **baguette fucker  
** never said we didn’t

*

 **get ur own dicc  
** right we’re stopping cause i need to pee and also i have been driving for 3 hours  
someone take over

 **fight me  
** can i drive

 **disney god  
** nO **  
** L I C E N S E

 **fight me  
** you never let me have any fun

 **disney god  
** we’re trying not to die in a foreign land

 **fight me  
** we’re still in america

 **disney god  
** look buddy unless i came out of my mother’s vagina here we’re in foreign land

 **angel  
** thank you for the mental image

 **disney god  
** you’re welcome

 **fight me  
** that is a very specific quota

 **dosiaaa  
** where are you even from herc

 **disney god  
** Ireland

 **get ur own dicc  
** wait wHAT

 **disney god  
** did you not know?

 **get ur own dicc  
** nO???

 **baguette fucker  
** why don’t you have an accent??

 **disney god  
** i moved here when i was 6  
it would be a bit strange if i still had an accent

 **get ur own dicc  
** okay i’ll deal with that later  
but seriously who’s driving next

 **fight me  
** everyone in the poly squad has driven but me

 **baguette fucker  
** and that way it shall stay

 **better than you  
** i’ll drive then  
i rather not have alexander hamilton be my cause of death

 **fight me  
** i’m not sitting shotgun with him

 **better than you  
** thank god

 **aaron burr  
** Why are we like this?

 **peggy  
** déjà vu

 **eliza  
** it’s a question for the ages

*

 **jamesmadd  
** i still don’t understand why i’m next to thomas  
or rather i do understand but i don’t want to

 **eliza  
** the diplomatic answer is that we know you can stand him

 **jamesmadd  
** we broke up

 **eliza  
** …  
more than the rest of us

 **get ur own dicc**  
the less diplomatic answer is that we are all v curious what happened and we are hoping one of you would let it slip

 **jamesmadd  
** are you kidding me  
i’m just going to sit here in silence then

 **fight me  
** it’s a three hour drive  
you can’t do that

 **jamesmadd  
** i’m not you so i can actually not talk for three hours

 **fight me  
** rude i’m being dragged

 **jamesmadd  
** and also  
watch me

 **fight me  
** i want to say he is learning that from me

 **angel  
** how about no one talks so we can have a pleasant drive for once

 **get ur own dicc  
** Mother™ has spoken

*

 **The Poly Squad**  
_baguette fucker, disney god, fight me, get ur own dicc_

 **get ur own dicc  
** do you ever think we’ll ever be like that

 **disney god  
** like what

 **get ur own dicc  
** like thomas and james  
like we break up or something and we just end up bitter

 **fight me  
** they ended up in bed together so i’m not worried

 **get ur own dicc  
** they just slept in the same bed that doesn’t really mean anything

 **baguette fucker  
** we’re not going to break up

 **get ur own dicc  
** yeah but what if we do??

 **fight me  
** n o

 **disney god  
** look if we ever end up at a point where we can’t even stand each other  
then that’s really sad  
but we can’t predict the future  
and rn we are happy  
relationships are work  
so the question is whether we are willing to work for this relationship  
and as it is rn i’m v in love for all of you and am willing to work to make this work

 **get ur own dicc  
** ,,,  
i’m crying

 **baguette fucker  
** when did hercules get so wise

 **disney god  
** someone has to hold this group together

 **fight me  
** have you guys ever thought about how we say ily to each other  
like we never came to a general agreement whether we meant it  
we just started saying it  
and pretty early on in the relationship as it is

 **get ur own dicc  
** are you saying every time you say ily you don’t actually mean it?

 **fight me  
** what no i do mean it  
i’m just saying we said it pretty early on

 **get ur own dicc  
** well i meant it everything

 **baguette fucker  
** same here

 **disney god  
** ditto

 **fight me  
** okay we all mean it

 **disney god  
** have you just been thinking we’ve all been saying it for fun

 **fight me  
** ,,,  
kinda  
i mean we did move pretty fast  
we all ended up together because of one kiss  
and we moved in together after like a month of knowing each other  
and i’m always worried we’re gonna crash and burn

 **baguette fucker  
** bAbe  
okay we all gotta Communicate™ better with each other

 **get ur own dicc  
** i agree  
does anyone have any issues they want to bring up rn

 **fight me  
** it was just those few

 **disney god  
** can’t think of any rn

 **get ur own dicc  
** i love all of you so much

 **fight me  
**!!so do i!!

 **baguette fucker  
** i love you too!!

 **disney god  
** you’re all such saps  
i love all of you  
now we got like a three hour drive ahead of us  
let’s take a nap

 **baguette fucker  
** kay

*

 **the squad**   **  
**_aaron burr, angel, ayyyymaria, baguette fucker, better than you, disney god, dosiaaa, eliza, fight me, get ur own dicc, jamesmadd, peggy_

 **angel  
** i turn around to let everyone know we’re here and what do i see  
these four taking a nap **  
** they are just sprawled on top of each other  
how

 **disney god  
** cause we love each other

 **angel  
** gross

**Author's Note:**

> [LMM voice] Hello hello hello!
> 
> Today's chapter is brought to you by Bastille's Wild World and clipping's Splendor & Misery. **If you've listened to Wild World, please come[talk to me](http://bisexualexhamilton.tumblr.com/message) about it.** None of my friends listen to Bastille, I am dying and need to talk. If you wanna talk about Splendor  & Misery, that's good too! We can talk about Story 5 and how much we love Daveed Diggs.
> 
> I want you to know that while tagging the story, I nearly tagged Lafayette as 'baguette fucker'; I have a problem.
> 
> To everyone who read my last update and is concerned about my broken heart, there is no need to fight. It's just me and ~~the GWB~~ my inability to tell if my interest is reciprocated. We'll survive, don't worry. Nevertheless, I fully appreciate the number of you who were willing to sacrifice blood, sweat and tears for my happiness.
> 
> As always, my fandom tumblr is @[bisexualexhamilton](http://bisexualexhamilton.tumblr.com) and my writing tumblr is @[covetsubjugation](http://covetsubjugation.tumblr.com). I'm always happy to talk! But seriously tho, come talk to me about Wild World, I'm so !!!
> 
> Feel free to leave kudos and/or comments! I'll see you around.


End file.
